Alright. A free advert for Lightspeed, you say? ... well, kinda. But only because Jordan Capri is probably one of the most impossibly hot girls I've have ever seen. Really, its kinda ridiculous already. Like how does anyone get anything done around her town? Is there a place in America where grown men stand like zombies, slack-jawed and immobile, while literally HUNDREDS of "acceptable" to "above average" women grind their teeth in jealous frustration?
England! Her Majesty's Holy Empire! Crown-Jewel of majestic Europe! Boiled Meat! And provider of a disproportionate amount of topless female models! Unfortunately, Layla Kayleigh is not one of these, but she's still sporting enough to take almost everything else off at one point or another. And the good business sense to seek out a small-time news update job on G4, and therefore diversify her male fanbase unto the most lucrative, and distrubing, in the world: American nerds. 
Sometimes its fun to oogle someone who you've already seen violated six ways from Easter Sunday. That being said, but for this girl's "sweet" face and body, she's just another vivid pornstar. Seriously, I've seen road cones go into this girl's.... ummm... lets say "one-way street". I'm not sure if that makes me dig her more or less... but its definitely a great way tomake sure I remember her. There ya go, ladies. Take that Cosmo. 
"That girl's got devil eyes!" No, but seriously, this is another one for the category of "Will-look-like-they're-16-until-age-50" chicks. And what's wrong with that category, you may ask? That I'm not swimming in a pile of its members, thats what. And NOTHING else.
Ah yes, the first woman to make me realize girls had something other than cooties. Nothing quite like that 3rd-grade, extremely-confused reaction to seeing immaculate breasts for the first time. I don't care if this chick is wrinkled and missing all of her teeth now, I'd still hit it if only for posterity's sake..
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Don't ask why, but I caught myself watching "I Now Pronounce You Chuck & Larry" the other night (btw... does Adam Sandler substitute actual comedy for adding a new comedians from his flock at Happy Madison now? It just seems everything he touches turns to shit, and yet he gets top billing over the vastly-more funny people that he surrounds himself with), and the only thing that kept me watching was the entrancingly hot Jessica Biel. Seriously. Look at that body. It doesn't just look sexy... it looks fun. I don't know what that means... but I definitely mean it. Logic bomb, bitch!
Oh, to be South Korean. Vaguely anime-resembling consorts, an unhealthy obsession with anything Blizzard makes, and a lifelong, blood-related sibling country that apparently was not hugged enough as a child. Not to mention that the qualifications for sleeping with top shelf women there is pretty much: "Are you American?". There's just not enough of those kinda countries left these days.
I'm sorry, but I fucking love this chick. Given that Fantasy Football is soon to begin, I'd wager that the infrequency of posts on this blog will only become more of the norm as the autumn goes by. 
