My Ulec Quel-Droma can beat up your Exar Kun!

In another issue of two-days-late-news, Lucasarts released the first trailer for Star Wars: The Force Unleashed" at E3 this week. Basically, from what I and my Teddy Rumpskin dressed as an Ewok doll can decipher, herein lies the first Star Wars button-masher. And we say this (well, at least I do. Good ol' Teddy/Wicket usually just responds to my questions with some bullshit about wanting to read me the Three Little Pigs via a 1987 cassette tape......that cold, uncaring bastard) with the upmost glee in our loins.

Despite whatever criticism one could launch on the genre as to how much skill these games require to play*, let me say two things:
1) Devil May Cry
2) God of War

And now, turn Dante/Kratos into a Jedi Knight.......

....whoops, I hope that doesn't stain.......

* - Devil May Cry 3 is harder to beat than a rhesus-monkey on angel dust......who's just been laid off from his job at the plant......and is an Oakland Raiders fan....

Ka....like the wind......

"The man in black fled across the desert, and the gunslinger followed...."

This is rather dated and ambigious info, but its need to be mentioned is apparent:

Stephen King has sold the rights to a series of movies based upon his landmark and unequaled masterpiece of an uber-story, "The Dark Tower", to J.J. Abrams and Damon Lindelof (of "Lost" fame) for $19.00.

That's right. Nineteen bucks.

Okay, if you are a Dark Tower freak, as I most obviously am, you already know the significance of the number 19, particularly within the 5th, 6th and 7th installments. Which is, of course, just a tasty little nugget* as to why I am fairly confident that A) we will see a film adaptation of "The Gunslinger" within the next five years, and B) for everything bad anyone could say about previous S.King movies, this one looks to be going to ACTUAL fans of the series, hence might be the most orgasmatastical** event in the history of the human sense of vision.

here's one of the many stories around the net that covers this solstace of badassery: SlashFilm, but there seem to be many, many more to be found...


* - This, however, is not a nugget, despite several credible reports from our Nobel prize-winning staff journalist.
** - Oh yes, that IS a word. And here is its definition.