Thursday, October 4, 2007

Eva's Genital Winter

I held off on this one for a few days, but alot of buzz was flying around the net in the past few weeks about a forthcoming Eva Longoria sex tape, filmed with husband, Tony Parker. Well, the tape hit earlier this week, much to the chagrin of almost every heterosexual male who owns a computer. Apparently, Longoria's tape was a spoof of the recent fad of leaked celebrity sex-capades, made for Will Ferrell's Funny-Or-Die website. While it isn't really that funny, no more than an occasional strained smile, I will give her credit for headfaking literally the entire blogosphere. But minus two points for catalyzing the largest outbreak of blue balls this year. Furthermore, minus another six points for not doing so before me in person, so I could give her the old "C'mon, baby, you can't leave me like this... I might go sterile... or die... " argument. And before you laugh at that (provided anybody laughs at my sense of humor... ever.), you should know that such an argument works surprisingly well in real life. Its right up there next to "Just the tip, I promise, just to see how it feels..." Ah, remember guys, if she's already naked and in your bed, she's apt to do just about damn near anything. God bless America.


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