Friday, February 29, 2008

Exhibit B

Well, in shocking news of the incredibly sarcastic variety, rumors are beginning to circulate that Pink and Carey Hart's marriage was ended by the aforementioned testosterone-tits due to her rampants affairs with other women. Firstly, I refuse to use the term "lesbian" in any way to illustrate this post. Lesbianism is a beautiful, pure act, given by God (and/or Sublime Directory)... to me... to show how much he loves me. This, however, is more along the lines of a very unsettling pop-up window for a specialty fetish website, which appears due to God's penchant for spyware.

As if I needed further proof of my hypothesis on the subject of Pink's physiology, this article also features a classic quote explaining how she finds the very notion of giving a blowjob "disgusting"; claiming that she would never perform one. Recieve one? Well, that's a totally different story. It takes a special kind of shemale to prefer sex with women. Usually the kind that is paid handsomely by a Thai internet consortium whilst filming the act.

Now, if you'll excuse me, writing this post has unfortunately caused me to repeatedly vomit on my keyboard... and the sound of the *squish squish* as I type is starting to become upsetting. Musical, but upsetting nonetheless.

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