An interesting little collection here of supposed celebrity lesbian crushes, cultivated from a myriad of interviews over the years. The list includes Eva Longoria's desires for Eva Mendez, Jessica Simpson and Jessica Alba, as well Carmen Electra's longing for Scarlett Johansson and several other beautifully blue-balling combinations. Now this is the sort of thing you'd expect me to be jumping in the air about, vigorously pleasuring myself while singing Handel's Messiah. However, this is exactly the kind of thing you hear from thousands of college girls every day. "Oh.... My... God... Angelina Jolie is so hot. I'm not a lesbian... but I'd totally do her". Two things, Shirley McSigmaEpisilonPhi: 1) No... you wouldn't. Sure, if you had no other choice, then you'd prefer Angelina Jolie.... but I really doubt you would enthusiatically perform oral sex on her.... saying you'd put your mouth on a vagina is alot different from actually doing it; 2) Saying this kind of thing doesn't make your guy friends think you're cool..... it makes them think they might get to see you "d-out" with some attractive girl.... which won't happen, ever, and therefore will only infuriate them on the inside. But, if girls keep insisting on teasing us with supposed lesbianism, let me make a mild suggestion: Next time you're boyfriend says some celebrity female is hot while your watching t.v. together, just suddenly rip off your pants and start playing with yourself whilst loudly moaning said celebrities name, instead of just agreeing with him. Maybe then he might touch you again. Probably not, though. You really should get that underbite fixed, lady. And that mustache ain't doing you no favors, either. Friday, August 31, 2007
Majoring in Sexual Orientation
An interesting little collection here of supposed celebrity lesbian crushes, cultivated from a myriad of interviews over the years. The list includes Eva Longoria's desires for Eva Mendez, Jessica Simpson and Jessica Alba, as well Carmen Electra's longing for Scarlett Johansson and several other beautifully blue-balling combinations. Now this is the sort of thing you'd expect me to be jumping in the air about, vigorously pleasuring myself while singing Handel's Messiah. However, this is exactly the kind of thing you hear from thousands of college girls every day. "Oh.... My... God... Angelina Jolie is so hot. I'm not a lesbian... but I'd totally do her". Two things, Shirley McSigmaEpisilonPhi: 1) No... you wouldn't. Sure, if you had no other choice, then you'd prefer Angelina Jolie.... but I really doubt you would enthusiatically perform oral sex on her.... saying you'd put your mouth on a vagina is alot different from actually doing it; 2) Saying this kind of thing doesn't make your guy friends think you're cool..... it makes them think they might get to see you "d-out" with some attractive girl.... which won't happen, ever, and therefore will only infuriate them on the inside. But, if girls keep insisting on teasing us with supposed lesbianism, let me make a mild suggestion: Next time you're boyfriend says some celebrity female is hot while your watching t.v. together, just suddenly rip off your pants and start playing with yourself whilst loudly moaning said celebrities name, instead of just agreeing with him. Maybe then he might touch you again. Probably not, though. You really should get that underbite fixed, lady. And that mustache ain't doing you no favors, either. 
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