Maniblow hates Mrs. 3rd-String Quarterback

Barry Manilow cancelled his appearance on The View the other day, claiming that he could no longer be interviewed by the show's resident right-wing viewpoint, Elizabeth Hasselbeck. Manilow, who has performed on the show twice in the past year, claims that he could not "sacrifice his own beliefs for the sake of promoting (his) new album". Many have surmised that this is collateral damage from the well-publicized blowup between Hasselbeck and Manilow's long-time friend, Rosie O'Donell, earlier this year.

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Wow. Hows that for some superfluous news? 2 points to Manilow for sticking to his beliefs, but minus 16 points for siding with Rosie. And Ms. Hasselbeck, why do you have to betray the faith I placed in you on Survivor all those years ago? Is it a prerequisite these days that any white, blond girls with money have to be motherfucking Ann Coulter?! No matter what you say it is essentially an elaborate re-wording of the infamous phrase: "I think we should just trust the President in whatever he does, and support him 100%." And I've heard this argument about 150 fucking times since 2004 alone. As 150 members of the Young Female Republicans Association can atest to. "Well, I believe that sex should be reserved for marriage, and only between a man and a woman, and only under the watchful eyes of God and George W. Bush." "Ok, baby, well I believe in massive tax cuts for the rich and irrelevant and costly foreign wars." "You do?! I'm sooooo into you all of a sudden." And then I was sooooo into them. And 3 months later, that partially-aborted fetus was sooooooo out of her.

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By the way, this qualifies as a celebrity feud on the same order of something like Carrot Top hates Jorge Posada. It evokes the emotions of "who cares" more than anything else. But I care. Because we can't let a piece of misguided ass like Elizabeth Hasselbeck be forever sullied by Giants third-string quarterbacks. I can only imagine that is, of course, the reason behind her insanity. It must be horrible to be at a wasp gathering where all of your sorority sisters are talking about their orthodontist husbands and you only have the man that sucked too bad to be played before Jared Lorenzen. Shit, I play more professional football than that guy.

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