Uncle Kracker, remember him? No? Umm, ok, hmm. Oh, I got it I got it. Remember the fat guy with the tattoos, he was in Kid Rocks band, used to stand all the way in the back? Yeah, Yeah, him. Obviously his massive success after the Kid Rock era was just too much for him. He's been charged with second degree forcible sex offense in North Carolina and later stated he was blowing that popsicle stand to avoid charges. The would be vigilante is now in jail under 5 million dollars bail..........
I know he wasn't a huge star, but I'm pretty sure it can't be too hard for the guy to get a piece. What did this chick have in her vagina, gold dubloons? Did she have Davey Jones' heart in there? What could have lead him to do this? A person of his stature, his celebrity. His mere presence demands a large amount of reverance......and alcohol. Which I'm sure had something to do with it. Now the next time he wants to have sex he's gonna have to give up 3 packs of cigarettes, 1 sleeve of chocolate chip cookies and his butthole. Shame, next time you get that urge "Uncle", be a man. Use your hand.
.........
-SlapChicken-
1 comment:
Wow. I was wondering when he was going to make another popular song like "follow me." Oh well.
Post a Comment