Thursday, August 23, 2007

The Spirit of Scarlett Johansson

Scarlett Johansson has reportedly signed on to Frank Miller's newest work, The Spirit. Miller, who wrote Sin City and 300, is adapting the Will Eisner comicbook, and has also cast Samuel L. Jackson in the film. Johansson will play "Silken Floss", a character which draws heavily on the "dangerous curves" femme fatale slant.
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Even though this isn't an original Miller work, I'm fairly sure his penchant for the scantily-clad (whether they be cowboy-stripper Jessica Alba's, or loincloth-warrior Gerard Butler's) will pay huge dividends the second Scarlett comes on screen. And then, I too will "pay huge dividends".... all over the back of the neck of the person sitting infront of me. But before they can turn around, I will purposely spill my cherry slushee all over myself and look extremely surprised, saying "Man, I don't know either. I was just sitting here and all of a sudden there was a bright blue fire and then this thing was everywhere. I think it spontaneously combusted".
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Then, after they go to the bathroom, wash up and return, I'll do it again. Only this time, I'll spill the slushy on their neck for real, and wait till they turn around to "pay up", screaming "SUUUUUPER SLUSHEEEEEEE!" before running out the theater.

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